Often our grief feels bottomless, like it’s too big for our bodies to contain. And so we make the choice, consciously or unconsciously, to stay a bit numb, to keep busy, to look the other way.

Wise choices.

Grief is a land we’re not made to travel alone.

What if we remembered how to create a solid ground for grief, and travelled it together?

When we’re in the middle of change and nothing is clear, how do we find the way forward? We can’t go back, but we also don’t know which way to go now.

There are three loose phases to times of change, and the messy middle is where the magic is, if we can learn to stay there in a way that allows us to find our gold.

If you want to stop being judgemental, a nice first step is to stop judging the part of you that judges stuff.

Being judgemental in itself isn’t bad. It’s part of being discerning and knowing what we want, knowing what we’ll tolerate, knowing our boundaries.

The secret to becoming more accepting of yourself and of the rest of the world is to let your internal judge do its judgey thing, and taking what it says with as many grains of salt as you need.

This simple tool is a way of attuning to yourself more deeply in a way that feels really good. Taking the time to check in shows you you’re listening to yourself. Taking the time to find the right words shows you that you care. And as you learn the subtle nuances of how you feel, moment to moment, you’re validating your own experience (which is a powerful way, over time, of dismantling unworthiness and not-enoughness).

Give it a try!

When we’re small, we base our understanding of who we are and how we should behave by noticing the world around us. If we don’t learn to question this understanding as adults, we can end up feeling out of place in one or more areas of our lives, of not feeling authentically ourselves, in a way that’s hard to define.

There are seasons for rest and seasons for activity, times when new things are coming to life and times when old things are falling away.

I talk with Carol Anne on her podcast about how to navigate cycles and the power of aligning yourself to the way of the season you’re in. Lots of permission to be where you are, and to sink deeper into your own bones and your own magic.

The middle bit of change is hard. Messy middle.

It’s begun, change is happening, old routines and ways of being don’t work, but new ones haven’t been established yet so everything is chaos.